Saturday, September 19, 2009
Stay Beautiful
Perceptions of beauty,
Are so completely messed up these days. What kind of world do we live in if 'beautiful' is considered a size double 0? That is so far from realistic it's sickening. Nobody can look like those models in fashion magazines, showing us what's "in" or "out" this season. Those girls hardly eat, and they are far from happy. No person, especially young women, should everthink that that's what they need to look like to be considered beautiful.
And what happens when girls realize that they don't and can't look like that? They resort to unnatural forms of beauty: cutting, anorexia, bulimia, dying their hair, wearing obscene amounts of makeup, making sure that they only buy name-brand clothing. What does all of that lead to? Changing the amount of food you eat [or don't eat], changing your hair color and changing your outside exterior completely can't ever change who you are on the outside. You can still be absolutely miserable and hate your reflection in the mirror. Your perceptions won't change, no matter how much money you spend on being someone else.
Perfection is an epidemic. A deathly, deathly epidemic. There is no cure for the disease of wanting to be perfect. Nobody can ever attempt to describe and deal with everyone's perception of themself and fix it. It's impossible. There is only one way to fix this: be ourselves.
As cliche as it sounds, we all have to accept who we truly are. And whether you're a size 4 or a size 14, it doesn't matter. Everyone has to realize that they have special qualities that make them who they are, a certain... jenasaqua. And each person has at least one thing that they love about themselves. For me, it's my eyes. They change color depending on what I wear, and I always get compliments on them. When I get those compliments, I grin like a fool.
So I've come up with this concept, something to stop this cruelty that is plaguing young women [and even men] across the world. A list of essentials that every person needs in their arsenal:
1. Give a compliment to at least one person every single day. It's only a sentence. "I love your hair." "You look pretty today." "That dress looks so cute on you!" Though it might seem like something inconsequential, it could be the only nice thing that person hears all day. All week, even. It might make their day go from horrible to slightly better. And even if they smile for a brief moment, it's a smile, nonetheless.
2. Smile. Even when you don't feel like smiling, smile. It's scientifically proven that it takes less muscles to smile than it does to frown. Even the action puts you in a better mood.
3. Laugh. Everyday. It's good for your heart and soul.
4. Don't be quick to judge people. Judgement is what has led us to this problem in the first place. Meet people before you even start to think of judging them. They could be the sweetest person in the world, and you would have no idea if you chose not to befriend them.
5. Accept your flaws, and accept others flaws. Everyone has them, whether we admit it or not. And everyone, at least once in their life, has cried over those flaws of theirs. You don't have to highlight them, but they also don't have to rule your life.
You are who you are. And that you? They are absolutely beautiful.
I love waking up to read all of your comments and love for this blog. This is all for you! Keep sending in your reflections, pictures and comments to loveyoubeautiful@gmail.com and follow us on twitter @loveubeautiful :)
Each and every one of you is worth it <3
Friday, September 11, 2009
Kiss From a Rose
I love everything about this site possible. It's an amazing, perfect way to show girls that they really are beautiful in every way because it's not what you look like that counts. I'd like to say that I feel like I'm beautiful now, after everything that I've read on here. All the stories. But I'm just not to that point yet. I was a really athletic child. All I ever really did was run, play soccer, and play outside.
When I got to junior high, I started to gain weight, but I was never made fun of or upset about it. It was just a way of maturing, and my best friend was just like me. Overweight, but not bad. I thought I'd always have someone to rely on.
But high school came around, and my best friend put herself on Jenny Craig. She was motivated. She lost the weight. She looked beautiful, started getting all the guys, and I was...nothing. By myself. After all, I had nobody just like me anymore. I wasn't motivated. I had no metabolism, and couldn't force myself off the phone, or couch to even walk around the block.
I started to feel horrible every second of the day. My best friend was happy with her new boyfriend, and while I was happy for her, I couldn't help but feel left out. I got acne, horrible acne. And that's all that anyone saw of me. Just the red spots on my face, and not me.
I became paranoid, terrified that everyone was talking about me. Whispering behind their hands as I passed in the hallway. Calling me fat. Calling me ugly. To this day, I still can't wear some kind of normal t shirt to school. It has to be a tunic, or a dress. I have to carry a jacket with me everywhere I go because I can put it in my lap and cover my thighs. Or I can put it on and hide my fat.
Deep down inside. I know I'm not that fat. I'm actually pretty average weight. I'm tall, so my weight falls on my frame nicely. But I just can't help but feel fat. And ugly. When my best friend gets one pimple, her world comes to an end and all she does is complain about that one pimple. She doesn't know how good she's got it. How, every guy we have both liked always picks her.
I don't think I'm beautiful now, but I don't think I'm ugly either. I read a book called Uglies by Scott Westerfeld in which, when you turn 16, you get an operation to turn pretty. Then you move into New Pretty Town where the only rule is that you have to have fun all the time. But when the main character goes to a place where the people decide not to turn pretty, she realizes that it's not what is on the outside that counts. It's how you act that really matters. The way you treat people.
And I'm learning that. I really am. I know that my family will love me no matter what flaws I have. I realize that some of the girls at school I once considered pretty are actually ugly. In the sense that they are horrible people. They look down on people they consider beneath them. Then I thank goodness that I escaped turning out like that.
I'm learning to look in the mirror every day and pick out one thing that I find beautiful. And if not beautiful, then at least unique. My imperfect eyes? No one else has those. The scar on my leg from falling? All mine. I'm unique, and my thoughts make me beautiful, even if I don't consider the outside of me to be. This site has helped me so much.
Keep sending in your reflections and pictures to loveyoubeautiful@gmail.com AND ALSO I am in the process of creating a LYB playlist to listen to when you need that little pick me up and it should be up shortly! If you have any suggestions please let us know and remember to follow us on twitter @loveubeautiful! <3
Monday, September 7, 2009
Catch Me
Sent in by an anonymous reader. Keep sending in your reflections! This blog is for you <3
Being a teenager is hard, especially when you don’t feel secure in your own skin. Ever since I can remember I’ve been insecure about myself, I always felt like I wasn’t good enough or even pretty enough, but I was still true to myself and I had hope. I have braces since i was 8 that wasn’t a problem, actually I liked ‘em until I turned sixteen then everything went down, one of my closest friends passed away, acne appeared in my life, I had to use glasses and I also started to feel fat and like I didn’t belong anywhere, I remember crying every single night, I couldn’t see myself in a mirror or even hang out with my friends without feeling ugly. So yeah turning sixteen was everything but sweet.
“Everything happens for a reason” that’s what I stared to believe, ‘cause at that point I really needed something to believe in. One day I woke up, and I looked myself on the mirror, suddenly I was feeling beautiful for the first time in almost a year, I was so happy and everyone could see it. That’s when I realized that the best cure for anything is just accept yourself the way you’re, smile and believe. Believe ‘cause nothing last forever. Since that day I’ve been getting better and better, my acne is under control, I’m having my braces off in a couple of months and I’ve finally found the best “eating style” that works for me, but must important I feel so happy, strong, and beautiful.
“What doesn’t kill you, only makes you stronger”
P.S: I’m a true believer that beauty magazines only promote low self esteem, I remember feeling down ‘cause I didn’t look like those models at all, new flash: It’s call Photoshop. So please, do not think you don’t worth it, or that you’re ugly, ‘cause that’s a lie and totally breaks my heart, we are ALL beautiful and special in our own way, smile and keep getting better.
Remember to send in your pictures and reflections so loveyoubeautiful@gmail.com and follow us on twitter @loveubeautiful! <333>
Friday, August 21, 2009
I Love You, Man
Inspiration doesn’t usually come from the words spoken on a paper document. It comes from the heart; the belief that if you jump through fire you’re going to burned; and realize that you can be okay with that. It’s the steps you take to actually reach that ultimate goal you’ve been trying to reach since the early days of your life.
The strength a little kid is completely naïve to is comparable to the absolute need to accomplish by adults every day. A mental to do list that you carry around with you from the time you were 7 years old is as accessible as you’ve always thought it was. So you want to be an astronaut, but you say; I was 10 years old and stupid, I could never become an astronaut. That’s where you’ve gone off track.
To be inspired is to reach your own capabilities; and you’re capable of anything you’ve been inspired to do. Don’t confuse my words with aspiration, because that’s not what I’m talking about. If you want to be a singer, but can’t sing; who says you can’t be a singer? You don’t need to make it a profession. Scream at the top of your lungs in the car and love yourself for the worth of the words being thrown from your mouth and to that empty car.
Quoting Degrassi, ‘Life is a show, in every shade of the rainbow.’ Prove it to yourself that that’s true, it can be if you want it to be. You don’t need to prove anything to anyone else; as much as society pushes you to, do it for yourself.
Inactiveness is a true fault. You’ve got one life to live, so live it hard. Challenges are butterflies and obstacles are birds. Look at them as beautiful, not as a hindrance to your life. Everything that knocks you down should make you strong. If it’s weight that you’re trying to lose, you need to be happy with yourself before you try to lose that weight. If you’re happy with the way you look; trying to lose some of the weight you’ve gained is going to make you feel so much better. You’re enduring two positives at the same time. Those positives are going to give you a natural adrenaline and hormonal high that you’ll be able to look at yourself in the mirror and smile wide. Though, I didn’t write the book on weight loss, I do know that no matter how much you weigh, losing weight is the hardest damn thing you’ll ever endeavor into. Don’t let that get you down though. There are so many times when I wish that I could just get it all
sucked out. I tripped over so many things, not literally, on my way to the best years of my life. In no way am I saying you have to be skinny to be happy; I’m saying if you’re trying to lose those few extra pounds, then do it smart. Eating disorders are not something you want to deal with either.
Being happy with yourself is something that all of us wish we could accomplish. Are we ever happy though? I want a show of hands for the people who can say they’re honestly happy with the way things are going in their lives. Half of you might have your hands raised; how about the other half.
Confidence resides in your mind. A trick that I learned on the way to becoming much more confident with myself was this;
• Take a shower.
• Do your hair.
• Drink a really big glass of ice water.
• Sit outside.
• Breathe.
• Go look in the mirror.
• Smile.
I’m not guaranteeing these results, just a mere scientific discovery on my own. It’s not for everyone. If you do try this, let me know how you feel. I’ll put my email address at the end of this for comments or concerns. I just want to know how this made you feel. I’m not done yet, agony; I know.
An increase of the need to conform is bringing people down. I’ve heard people tell me that they weren’t accepted or even noticed in their high schools until they were walking the halls in designer brand clothes. I think the designer brands look alright, but what’s the point of buying Wal-Mart type clothing with a name slapped on it for $200 more than you can get at the off brand clothing store down the street.
Maybe you think you’re not worth the designer brand stuff, but believe me. No one truly is. Designer clothes are nothing compared to having self-satisfaction, believe me. I found that out the hard way. I walked into my middle school the first day decked out in my cousins old shirt that was 234324235 sizes too big for me and jeans that a belt couldn’t even hold up. I felt so out of place in my own school because I didn’t look ‘good’ like everyone else. I’m not a fan. I figured out quickly that I needed to change, I needed to be different. It wasn’t true though. The more and more I changed, the more I hated myself for not being who I was.
You know what, by the end of that school year, I came back to school in the same thing I wore on the first day and strutted it around that school. I got so many awkward stares. I felt good about it though.
I’m most likely boring you guys to death with my digressions and stories, but I needed to get this out. Maybe it might help someone who wants to reach out to someone; make them realize they might need that one extra person to talk to.
As I said I would do, I’m going to put my email address here, and hopefully all of you will take advantage of this and email me as soon as possible. I’m always checking my emails and I’ll reply to you quickly. Just if you might need someone to talk to or make comments on anything I’ve said. Thanks for your time.
Email; papioperson99@yahoo.com
Remember to keep sending in your photos and reflections to loveyoubeautiful@gmail.com and to follow us on twitter @loveubeautiful. It would really mean a lot to me to get more followers! Tell all your friends, for after all you are all worth it <3 <3 <3
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
You Are Beautiful :)
When I was in the third grade my family moved me into a high end elementary school. All of the people around me were stick thin and dressed in the best. I didn't. My family barely had the money to buy me clothes from Wal-Mart, none of that mattered to me before. But, when people point you out at school and laugh because your jeans weren't from American Eagle or I wasn't wearing Abercrombie. You quickly lose all of your self-esteem. I went from being happy and carefree to sad and spent my time with my nose in a book. I remember my dad working overtime one summer just so I could wear the best clothes. I remember thinking that would change things. It didn't, in fact it made it worse. I quit attempting to make friends and found myself hating life.
My prayers were answered when my family decided to move the summer before my eighth grade year. This time we moved to a middle class area where people didn't care as much what you wore or what you looked like. I found myself surrounded by friend who liked me. Not because I was decked out in name brand clothes or stick thin, but because I was me. I went from being the saddest girl ever to the happiest.
So whenever I am feeling unbeautiful or unloved I think back to how I felt when I was there. Nothing feels as bad as that does.
Whenever you are feeling unbeautiful or unloved remember YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND LOVED BY SO MANY.
Remember to keep sending in your photos and reflections! The next update is something special from someone with an amazing voice, I can't wait to share it with you! Send your thoughts, contributions, WHATEVER to loveyoubeautiful@gmail.com and follow us on twitter @loveubeautiful! <3 <3 <3
Thank you Martha for the picture<3
Thursday, August 13, 2009
You're All Amazing <3
Just wanted to say that your blog is quite amazing.
Every little thing about it is inspiring and its something
that all women and girls should read, because we should
all be able to feel beautiful.
Only lately have I felt as beautiful as I do now.
It never used to be this way though, there were
times when I didn't even want to go out because
I felt like people wouldn't talk to me, because
I wasn't beautiful. But now, I tell myself
every day that I am beautiful, outside and
definitely on the inside.
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart.
Helen Keller
So, Smile. Life is beautiful, and so are you.
Thank you for making this blog.